At what point is it better to switch from java.net to java.nio? .net (not the Microsoft entity) is easier to understand and more familiar, while nio is scalable, and comes w
Scalability will probably drive your choice of package. java.net will require one thread per socket. Coding it will be significantly easier. java.nio is much more efficient, but can be hairy to code around.
I would ask yourself how many connections you expect to be handling. If it's relatively few (say, < 100), I'd go with java.net.
Avoid NIO unless you have a good reason to use it. It's not much fun and may not be as beneficial as you would think. You may get better scalability once you are dealing with tens of thousands of connections, but at lower numbers you'll probably get better throughput with blocking IO. As always though, make your own measurements before committing to something you might regret.
Something else to consider is that if you want to use SSL, NIO makes it extremely painful.
The number of connections you're talking about tells me you should use java.net. Really, there's no reason to complexify your task with non-blocking I/O. (Unless your remote systems are underpowered, but then why are you using Java on them?)
Take a look at Apache's XML-RPC package. It's easy to use, completely hides the network stuff from you, and works over good ol' HTTP. No need to worry about protocol issues ... it'll all look like method calls to you, on both ends.
Given the small number of connections involved, java.net sounds like the right solution.
Other posters talked about using XML-RPC. This is a good choice if the volumes of data being shipped are small, however I have had bad experiences with XML-based protocols when writing inter-process communications that ship large amounts of data (e.g. large request/responses, or frequent small amounts of data). The cost of XML parsing is typically orders of magnitude higher than more optimised wire formats (e.g. ASN.1).
For low volume control applications the simplicity of XML-RPC should outweigh the performance costs. For high volume data communications it may be better to use a more efficient wire protocol.
There is almost no reason to write this kind of networking code from scratch now. Packages like netty.io will almost always get you more reliable and flexible code with fewer lines of code than a hand-crafted solution will. Also, with Netty, you can get SSL support w/o complicating your implementation at all. Libraries like netty also obviate the "async vs threads" question almost entirely, gives you good performance, and still lets you tweak the threading model as needed.