A few years ago I installed Apache 2.2x and PHP 5.3.1 on a Linux server I maintain. I used .tar.gz\'s and built them as instructed (instead of rpms and what-have-you). And
This works for me:
php -i | grep 'php.ini'
You should see something like:
Loaded Configuration File => /usr/local/lib/php.ini
p.s. To get only the php.inin path
php -i | grep /.+/php.ini -oE