MySQL has this incredibly useful yet proprietary REPLACE INTO SQL Command.
Can this easily be emulated in SQL Server 2005?
Starting a new Trans
The functionality you're looking for is traditionally called an UPSERT. Atleast knowing what it's called might help you find what you're looking for.
I don't think SQL Server 2005 has any great ways of doing this. 2008 introduces the MERGE statement that can be used to accomplish this as shown in: http://www.databasejournal.com/features/mssql/article.php/3739131 or http://blogs.conchango.com/davidportas/archive/2007/11/14/SQL-Server-2008-MERGE.aspx
Merge was available in the beta of 2005, but they removed it out in the final release.