I use the recent Ganymede release of Eclipse, specifically the distro for Java EE and web developers. I have installed a few additional plugins (e.g. Subclipse, Spring, Find
RAM is relatively cheap (not that this is an excuse for poor memory managmentment). Unused memory is essentially WASTED memory. If you're hitting limits and the IDE is the problem consider less multitasking, adjusting your memory reqs, or buy more. I wouldn't cripple Eclipse if that's your bread-and-butter IDE.