Is there something I can do like this (perhap via a plugin)
if ( ! $(\'form#contact input]\').hasFocus()) {
$(\'form#contact input:first]\').focus();
}
$('input:focus')
It's CSS. You don't need to create a "custom selector." It already exists! http://www.w3schools.com/CSS/pr_pseudo_focus.asp
Just attach whatever process you want to do to that selector, and it will weed it out if the element in question is not focused. I did this recently to keep a keyup from instantiating an email input error check when the e-mail input wasn't being used.
If all you're trying to do is check if the user has focused on anything themselves, just do this:
if($('input:focus').size() == 0){
/* Perform your function! */
}